Did you enjoy channel 4's The Family this week?
I did!
One of my favourite quotes from the Adesinas was from Vicky the matriarch on her desire to see her son Ayo married: "He doesn't need to rush, he just needs to be... fast." Classic.
The spotlight was firmly on Ayo (above: picture courtesy of channel 4) this week. At 27, as is the Nigerian culture, Ayo was feeling the pressure of being the eldest son.
You can catch up here.
Ayo was evidently still in love with one of his exes, which felt unfortunate because he was still weighing up the option of getting back with her, but he was doing absolutely nothing about it because of his mum's family's feelings of animosity towards her...
And it makes me wonder, how often we, as humans, seem content to rest in a state of limbo.
In Ayo's case he was neither willing to walk away, leave the past behind and meet someone else he could settle down with, nor face the wrath of his mother and find out how his ex felt and attempt to make the relationship work if she felt the same. So he stayed in the same place. It's the easiest thing to do, but not the most beneficial.
Choosing either option brings an element of risk, yes, but the potential rewards are so evident: a) Finding that the aforementioned woman is a great match for him after all - or b) someone else is. And this is where the word responsibility comes in. Is he willing to face up to this? I cannot guess, but I know how easy it is to lay life decisions in someone else's hands (in this case, his mother) because it seems to absolve oneself of blame if it goes seins up. But life is a risk. We are the result of one spermatozoon taking a risk and racing as fast as it could to the proverbial finishing line - the egg. So why can't so many of us run with that relentlessness throughout life?
This is a note to self as much as it is to anyone else to make a bold decision - and be wise about it - rather than doing absolutely nothing and fall just short of happiness, just for fear of failing.
It's not easy o, but Ayo - make a decision. You don't need to rush, you just need to be... fast.
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So, am I being too idealistic here? Should he bide his time? Wait till his mum goes back to Nigeria ;o)? Is there anything wrong with waiting? What are your thoughts on risk-taking in general? Let me know below.
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